Jiovani's World

I havent came up with a name for this but I just need to get this off my chest. As some of u may know that for the weekend I came back to ft. stewart. Its cool and everything but now that I've been here u know I kind of get the feeling as if Im becoming a burden or that the person who came and got me wants me gone. Maybe it's just me cause of what i've been through lately and its changed the way I see people and certain situations. I cant really too much say anything about what they're doing cause its none of my business of who they talk to or do it with. But when Im ur guest and ur the one who wanted me to come down here n I dont feel wanted there is a big fuckin problem. 

Is it too hard to find that one person who u can share evrything with and who would want to be there for u no matter what it is? Not that Im looking cause my head is still fucked up from the last relationship but when it seems like everytime I get close to someone and confide in them about shit that relationship/friendship never works... Maybe its supposed to be like that... why do I feel like Im alone in this world? No matter how many people are on it or who Im around i still feel alone. I feel like Im just taking up space  sometimes cause no one seems to notice that Im here.... i can only hold so much in before it comes out one way or the other, without anyone that I can actually talk to and who will just listen Im overwhelmed with things. I can only give it over to God, but even that seems hard cause no matter how much I try it always seems to come back to me. I tend to think about a lot of things and I try and play out every scenario in my head and that is what is driving me crazy. I cant seem to let things go, im not one to express myself just openly... it takes a lot for me to open up. The only way that I can even remotely open up is to blog about it or write it down in a notebook I keep. I think that Im going insane!!